When most of us walk into a room, we feel that everyone is looking at us, waiting for us to trip and fall. Of course the reality is that no one really cares but if you’re self-conscious by nature, it certainly doesn’t feel that way.
I’ve found a fairly easy way to shed that feeling and it involves the practice of reflective listening. In effect, you take the spotlight or the scrutiny off of yourself and put it on those you are interacting with.
When we walk into that room, there is no spotlight on us but there is a mirror directed at us and that mirror is our own self-consciousness and it’s like one of those magnifying make-up or shaving mirrors where every pore in your face is the size of a dime. You’re aware of every flub, every twitch, every “like” and “you know”.
But what if you could just turn that mirror around? What if you could stop being self-conscious and learn to be conscious of others?
Reflective listening allows you to turn that mirror around. It not only will relieve your own self-scrutiny but will allow you to become a supporter of others. And therein lies your power. By learning to take the spotlight off of yourself, to turn the mirror around, you will be able to better relate to others and they to relate to you.